After watching (in horror) Focus with Freek Robinson on Sunday afternoon, I decided to write a parenting hint every day. I am very conderned about to-days children mainly because of family integration and parents who do not understand their children or who lack parenting skills. Too little time for children is also a factor. Stress and depression are contributing factors.

Relationship come before rules and disciplining. I talked to a friend yesterday and she says she is going to change jobs in order for her to have more times for her two small children and it is a step don for her in her career. And I really salute her forthat. The mutual relationship in the family took precedence and she will see the fruit.

Parents it is necessary that you have a unique relationship wih each of your children. They must never feel that my Dad or mother likes my little sister more than me.   

My hint for to-day is: Take time to understand who they are, with their special interests, talents and emotional make ups. Chilkdren is into fairness and they will complain if you do not provide equal reatment. They need to trust you to love each one equally, even if the expression of that love differ somewhat according to each child\’s uniqueness and specific needs. Parent it is not about you, it is about the child. I often cry in my heart if I see a child\’s face when there is unfairness or favouring.

Love them as they are.

Remember as I said previously:  live by your values.

But be the authority figure. This provides security in the family - first love, then relationship, then values, then rules and consequences. Be consistent but fair